Don't let this happen to you...

...whether I mean become like this guy or eat at this restaurant is for you to decide.

Top food stories of 2012 - Commentary

This entry is dedicated to the memory of Velda Franklin (1935-2012).

We're already more than halfway through the first month of 2013, what better time to look back at the year that was 2012.

• Rising costs: It's not just you, the cost of filling your grocery cartt went up this past year. The summer drought devastated farmers and drove up food prices around the globe. As prices don't look like they will fall anytime soon, now is as good a time as any to start clipping coupons.
• Pink slime: Whether it was called lean finely textured beef, boneless lean beef trimmings, or finely textured meat, when people discovered this filler product was being used in their ground beef and beef-based processed meats, they did not like it. Though pink slime has been approved for human consumption since 2001, and is no more unappetizing than other things that are routinely part of hamburger, concerns about package mislabeling, and the use of ammonium hydroxide in the production of pink slime has caused some grocery retailers to stop selling products that contain it, and some food manufactures to stop using it in their products.
• Soda size: Soft drink sizes made the news after the mayor of New York City moved to regulate portion sizes of soft drink serves. An editorial in the Canadian Medical Association Journal has supported this move saying “...(b)ecause sugary drinks are the leading source of dietary calories in North America, New York City’s latest measure is a rational strategy to combat obesity on a population level”. This brought on cries of too much government interference in people's lives from the easily excitable, who also were demanding more from the nation's food inspectors during the last beef recall. Go figure.
• The Twinkie Panic: Hostess Brands went out of business in 2012, and snack cake fans lost their minds at the thought of the sponge cake stuffed with creamy filling disappearing from stores forever. While I would regret never tasting the deep-fried version, the loss of the Twinkie wouldn't bother me, but fans of the treat can take solace in a similar pastry now on the market, or wait until the brand is sold to a competitor.
• Hot restaurants that opened in Ottawa: Union 613; 327 Wine Bar; Hintonburg Public House; and Town
• Kale is out, beets are in, and foie grie is as illegal to sell as crack in California.
• Food trucks and pop up restaurants were extremely popular in 2012. Not surprisingly, Ottawa was late to follow the food truck trend, but the announcement of 45 new food truck licenses will add to a tasty collective that already includes vendors such as Trailer Pork Boys, Stone Soup Foodworks,  Bite This, Relish and the Flatbread Pizza Co. Many foodies hope more chefs follow Matthew Carmichael's lead and start up a pop restaurant in one of Ottawa's other distinctive establishments. Picture a sudden supper club suddenly appear in the Laff one weekend? It could happen in 2013...
• Celebrity chefs behaving badly include Paula Deen, for revealing her struggles with diabetes after lining up a drug endorsement deal; Guy Fieri, for earning the worst possible review for his new Times Square restaurant; and Gordon Ramsey, for picking fights with Mario Batali, and Jamie Oliver just because he can.
• Hot cookbook for cooking nerds: "The Science of Good Cooking".

Last meal

According to the ancient Mayans, the world will be ending this Friday. I don't believe in doomsday prophecies, so I hadn't had any thoughts about how I'd spend my remaining hours alive, or who I would spend those last precious moments with. But it did get me thinking. I got to thinking about what I would like my last meal ever to be. This is something I didn't think I'd ever have to consider unless I did something very very bad, and Canada reinstates the death penalty. And I'm talking bad. Like Timothy McVeigh bad. Before dying by lethal injection, he ate 2 pints of Ben & Jerry's mint chocolate ice cream for his last meal alive. For his final meal, one criminal in Georgia ordered filet mingnon wrapped in bacon; de-veined shrimp sauteed in garlic butter with lemon; a baked potato with butter, sour cream, chives, and real bacon bits; corn on the cob; asparagus with hollandaise sauce; French bread with butter; goat cheese; cantaloupe; apple pie with vanilla bean ice cream and an iced tea. Imagine seeing that on the dinner table for you when it's time to eat. It's not as appetizing when you realize it's someone's last meal. Knowing it's the last thing I'll ever eat, I'm not even sure how much I'd enjoy my meal. I imagine having my life end at the stroke of midnight would do a number on my stomach. But for the sake of this blog entry, let's say I managed to come to grips with the reality of my fate, and I had built up an appetite. I'd love to have a simple Caesar salad, served along with some duck confit and some macaroni and cheese made with the recipe I've been using recently. Macaroni and cheese is the ultimate comfort food, which is really what you're looking for if it's the final thing you'll ever eat. I'm not much of a dessert eater, but for this occasion, I'd have a slice of New York cheesecake. And I'd wash everything down with a bottle or two of La Fin du Monde beer, just because.

Ingredients

4 tablespoons butter
2 tablespoons flour
2 cups milk
1.5 cups grated cheddar cheese
1.5 cups grated mozzarella cheese
2 cups elbow macaroni
1/2 cup mushrooms

1. Melt 2 tablespoons of butter in a pan over medium heat. Add the flour and stir the mixture constantly until it turns a light brown in colour. Pour in the milk, increase the heat to medium-high, and stir until thickened. Add the cheeses and stir until everything is melted.
2. Cook the pasta according to the directions on the package. When it's ready, strain and mix in the cheese sauce. In a small skillet, melt the remaining butter, add the mushrooms, and sauté them until they are softened and golden brown. Once done, mix them in with the macaroni.
3. Transfer everything to a baking pan, and put it in the oven for 20 minutes at 350 ^oF.

What would your last meal be? Feel free to add your selection in the comments section, or on my Twitter feed.

Worst. TV Cook. Ever.

Meet Steven Reed, host of Weber Cooks, a show that streams on the Weber State University news site. I'm not sure how this guy got this show, but after watching it, it's clear that the students of this Utah institute of higher learning must appreciate its unintentional comedy. This guy makes Guy Fieri look like Tom Colicchio.

Tips for the Ottawa Wine and Food Festival

At the risk of losing whatever foodie cred I have, I won't be going to this year's Ottawa Wine and Food Festival. With a young son and Christmas just around the corner, there's only so much time, money, and energy a guy has to give. But that won't stop me from offering some advice to those of you who plan to check out this annual taste extravaganza.

• Buy your Day Pass online, unless you enjoy waiting in long lines. Hit the ATM beforehand to avoid that lineup as well.
• Go in the early afternoon to avoid the suppertime rush.
• Leave your jacket in the car. It’s hot inside and just another thing to lug around.
• Bring your appetite. Otherwise, what's the point? 
• Forgo dressing up and wear comfortable clothes and shoes. That doesn't mean sweatpants and Snuggies, use your common sense. I know a lot of people use the Festival as a destination for date nights, but putting on your finest duds to sample food, even great food, is silly. There's a reason you don't feel the need to wear a tuxedo or your little black dress when you visit the sample person at the supermarket.
• Budget accordingly, you can only purchase $60 worth of sampling tickets at one time anyways.
• Keep hydrated with water, especially if you only plan to hit the wine and liquor vendors. If your game plan is to only drink, arrange for a ride home afterward.
• Buying some travel-sized stomach remedies beforehand will help in case you overindulge.
• Try not to look greedy.
• Use this as an opportunity to try foods you wouldn't necessarily order at a restaurant, or make for yourself. That being said, remember that you only have so much room in your stomach.
• Bring a big bag to carry anything you buy.
• Remember to take pictures of products or foods you like.

DIY Pumpkin Spice Latte

Maybe it's the cooler weather, maybe it's seeing the leaves change colour, but sometimes you just got to have a pumpkin spice latte to sip and savour. But when that time hits, you may not want to spend $5 for a cup of coffee (I'm looking at you Starbucks...), or you might run the risk of getting disappointed when you ask for one at the counter, and are told that they ran out of the spice blends, or that the promotion ended for the season (I'm looking at you Second Cup, at two different locations...). Luckily, I found this recipe on the interwebs, so I won't get screwed over by Corporate Coffee again.

Ingredients

1/2 cup espresso
1.5 cups milk
1 tsp.vanilla
3/4 tsp cinnamon
1/2 tsp.ginger
1/4 tsp.nutmeg
1/4 tsp.all-spice
1/8 tsp.cloves
1 tbsp.maple syrup

1. Set up stove-top espresso machine over medium heat. It should take about 8 minutes to brew 1/2 cup.
2. In a small saucepan, whisk all spices, vanilla and maple syrup into the milk. Treat this like risotto and don't walk away, always be stirring. Keep heat medium to medium-low to avoid burning the milk or curdling.
3. When steam starts to rise from the milk, turn heat off but continue stirring.
   
   Optional: if you have a frother, now's the time to froth up your milk.
   
   
4. When espresso is brewed, pour milk mixture into mugs, and add espresso overtop.

No Fuss Thanksgiving dinner

For foodies, Thanksgiving is more than a long weekend. It's a time to show off some new recipes for family and friends, or an excuse to head out to their favourite restaurant and sample the Thanksgiving menu offerings. But for people who are already intimidated by cooking, or don't have the time or money to spend on a fancy meal, it's just another day to call for take-out or throw a frozen entree into the microwave. Thanksgiving dinner doesn't have to be an ordeal. Here's a way to have a traditional Thanksgiving meal without driving yourself crazy, or running yourself ragged.

Turkey

If cooking an entire turkey is too much of a hassle, buy individual turkey pieces or a turkey breast roast. Just follow the cooking instructions on the bag, or ask the butcher at your supermarket how long each piece should be cooked. If you want, you can slice the roast before serving it to your guests; as long as everything tastes good, no one will mind not seeing the turkey being carved.

Mashed Potatoes

A package of instant potatoes can be used in a pinch, but be sure to add lots of butter to mask the from-the-package taste (I recommend also adding Farm Boy's Authentic Steakhouse Garlic Dressing. After trying it, you won't be able to eat real or processed potatoes without it).

Gravy / Cranberry Sauce

Some people may turn their noses up at using something out of a can, but unless those people head to the local fish market to get the catch of the day whenever they want a tuna sandwich, they're only fooling themselves. For presentation purposes, the cranberry sauce can be sliced or mashed up a bit to remove the cylindrical shape. Once the gravy is heated and put in grandma's gravy boat, only the most discerning of eaters will notice it wasn't made with pan drippings and meat juices. 

Stuffing

There's a reason why Stove Top is a holiday staple. Take advantage of it.

 

Baked goods

Everyone loves the smell and taste of fresh baked goods. This can be achieved by using either the services of the Pillsbury Dough Boy, or your neighbourhood bakery. Most decent supermarkets have a bakery in-store, but if I may make the suggestion, I recommend a trip to the Murray St. or Bank St. location of  The French Baker (NOTE: the Bank St. location is no more.). While you're there, treat yourself and pick up some dessert.

A bottle of wine or two, your fanciest plates, cutlery and the proper place settings will round out your Turkey Day spread. Remember that even with a few corners cut here and there, the day is about being thankful for what we got. Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

This entry was inspired by a feature in Garth Sundem's book "The Geeks' Guide To World Domination".