Let Them Eat Cheesecake - Doug Ford's Famous Cheesecake Recipe

The chances you will try the recipe below depend on how you feel about Doug Ford. If you believe the Ford government can "Get It Done" because he works 24 hours a day for the people of Ontario, folks, you will eat up his cheesecake the same way you ate up promises to make Ontario "Open for business" with a highway that only benefits the GTA. If you believe he's a corrupt, incompetent politician who hasn't evolved from his alleged days as a teenage hash dealer, you probably came here because you need a dessert recipe. Rob Ford's older brother claims this recipe has been passed down to him from Mama Ford, who learned the recipe from her sister.  As his day of reckoning comes on June 2 with the provincial election, how the voting goes will determine if people will be making this cheesecake as part of a victory celebration, or as a way to cope with four more years of FORDNation.

Ingredients

3 packages of Dream Whip

3 packages of cream cheese

2 boxes of graham cracker crumbs

2 cans of cherry pie filling (Tory blue blueberries can be substituted if you're that partisan)

1 1/2 cups milk

1 cup icing sugar

1 cup sugar

1/2 brick of butter

1. Preheat the oven to 350 F (180 C). Empty the Dream Whip packets into a bowl, then add the milk and mix with an electric mixer on high until peaks form.
2. Microwave the cream cheese bricks for one minute. Mix the cream cheese and the icing sugar in with the Dream Whip. Once done, put it in the fridge to cool down.
3. Mix the butter, graham cracker crumbs, and sugar together in a pot on the stove. Press the ingredients onto the bottom of a baking pan and up the sides.
4. Bake for 20 minutes then remove it and let it cool for 15 minutes. Add the cheesecake filling onto the crust and spread it evenly, then put it in the fridge to let it chill for an hour.
5. Open cans of pie filling and spread evenly over the cheesecake. Chill for several hours before serving.